Remnants of Life

Posted on by Erin of the Hills

And now that they were long gone, these intriguing remnants of the lives they’d led were all the proof that remained that they had ever been here.

Mike Gayle, The Museum of Ordinary People

I came across the quote above while reading Mike Gayle’s wonderful novel and it struck me once again when I started to think about this long-overdue chapter of my France travelogue.

It seems a lot of the novels I’ve been reading lately have been focused in some way on what we leave behind when we exit this plane. I guess it’s something I myself have been thinking about a lot since I had children. It’s both nice and heartbreaking to think that my two beautiful daughters will be the majority of my legacy. Discussions about instinctual procreation aside, I love the idea that once (many, many, many years from now) I’ve moved on from this life, a part of me will live on in them.

Cue “He Lives in You” from The Lion King.

That miracle being acknowledged, I hate the thought of ever leaving them. Even if they too have already lived long and full lives once my time comes.

Wow. That got dark. Moving on.

Something else I thought about in preparation for this post is that even people as famous as Richard the First of England and Joan of Arc of France did not leave significantly more stuff behind when their time on earth ended. Sure, the Lionheart has left castles and jewels and progeny but…as far as material evidence of who he really was at his core? Not much.

The ultimate equalizer, death.

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Things that have Never Been

Posted on by Erin of the Hills

And now we welcome the new year. Full of things that have never been.

-Rainer Maria Rilke

OK, OK, I know it’s not the new year. But it kind of is in a sense for me. I’ve restarted my exercise regime for the first time since my 2.5-year-old was born and it feels amazing. I’m also writing at a minimum twice a week now which has not happened consistently since before kids.

And I’m reading. Oh, I’m reading up a storm.

Not only am I reading, dear reader, but I’m reading with a promise to review. Yes, I finally signed up for Netgalley. Nothing like a social commitment to challenge oneself.

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Done Questioning

Posted on by Erin of the Hills

Do not let what you think they think of you make you stop and question everything you are.

Carrie Fisher

I’m not sure what your opinion on the late, great Carrie Fisher is. Despite having found her tweets incredibly confounding, what long-form writing of hers I was exposed to really stayed with me. Postcards from the Edge might be the first book I’ve ever read where the author’s voice truly struck me as unique.

Now…this may say more about where I was in my reading journey and life overall at the time than being any kind of disparaging comment on anything I had read previously but…I digress.

The point is, whether she meant this or not, in reading that book I truly felt as if Ms. Fisher herself was speaking to me – trying to explain something about who she was and what her seemingly glamorous life was or had been like. It went beyond memoir or autobiography, despite being fiction. Like cracking open a soul.

Her book confirmed what I had already surmised: I wanted to write and I wanted to write in my own voice – not one that was prescribed to me.

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A Bookish Atmosphere

Posted on by Erin of the Hills

This place has atmosphere, different from a bookshop with just new books. In here you sense the weight of time stretching way back to the past.

Michiko Aoyama, What You Are Looking For is in The Library

I’ve always found that for both writing and reading, atmosphere is important to me. Now, this is not to say that I can only read or write in a specific location. Only that to fully focus my creative mind, I need to feel comfortable in my surroundings.

When we first saw the house we now call home, back in January, it was not initially what I thought we had been looking for. Most of the houses we had looked at leading up to this one had been just out of town with at least an acre of land (one actually had 5!) They were my vision of an oasis of tranquility where we could escape just a little from the frantic pace of modern life.

Having looked at all these beautiful country homes, we decided to check this one out for a very specific reason. I had grown up only a 5-minute walk from my elementary school and I remember truly loving being so close…especially as someone who has never been a morning person and for whom mornings were less than tranquil. This house would give the girls the same experience growing up but it was far from the secluded country retreat I had been dreaming about. Regardless, it seemed to be perfectly situated for the kids on a quiet cul-de-sac close to not only their school but also the walking path, fair grounds and library. And that meant something.

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A Glimpse

Posted on by Erin of the Hills

For years I functioned fairly well in the world, but I had an underlying sense that I was fooling people, and I was driven to achieve in order to counter that suspicion. And when I was with other people, would avoid dropping my guard out of fear that they would glimpse the real me and blow my whole act to pieces. – No Bad Parts, Richard C. Schwartz PhD.

Have you ever read something so heart wrenchingly personal that you immediately feel the writer was actually addressing you? It’s happened to me before but never as intensely as when I read that quote above. I’m still a little shaken by it, to be honest. It could have been written by me.

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Marvels and Possibilities

Posted on by Erin of the Hills

And then another thought floated in there, sneaking in while I was feeling so open to wonders and marvels and possibilities: maybe that means there’s a path for me too, a plan that won’t fail, and I just haven’t found it yet. – Shauna Robinson, The Banned Bookshop of Maggie Banks

Hello dear readers. It’s been a while.

When I look at how long ago I published my last post (January), I feel a shudder of disappointment in myself and my lack of commitment to this corner of the internet that I have so lovingly built. As these waves of self-doubt start to overwhelm me, I have to fight to keep my head above these murky waters and remind myself that it’s OK. I am OK. No, wait, I’m better than OK. And I’ll tell you why.

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Reading Roundup: December 2023

Posted on by Erin of the Hills

Never trust anyone who has not brought a book with them.

Lemony Snicket, Horseradish: Bitter Truths You Can’t Avoid

Happy New Year Everyone!

Well, the last month flew by and I did not get any writing done. However, I managed to squeeze in quite a bit of reading so I’m going to go ahead and call that a win.

I couldn’t help but choose the Lemony Snicket quote above to kick off my first post of the year as one of my main hopes for 2024 is to finally wrest myself from the persistent phone addiction that has had me in a chokehold since the pandemic. Part of my strategy to achieve this includes bringing a book everywhere I go to get out of the habit of pulling out my phone whenever I need to wait even 5 minutes for something. Another change I’ll be making is no more phone in the bathroom (don’t lie, you do it too). Hopefully these small changes will lead to even more reading this year…one can only hope!

But, without further ado, let’s take a look at all the wonderful things I managed to read in December, shall we? Who knows, maybe you’ll find your next great inspiration here. I certainly took something away from each and every one of these articles, blogs and books; do let me know if you do too, it’s the reason I write these posts in the first place. Happy Reading!

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Resolving 2024

Posted on by Erin of the Hills

Dawn. A cool, clear dawn, with strands of coral cloud parting like old wool to allow the sun to rise through them.

Morgan Llywelyn, Bard

Holy moly we only have two more weeks left to go until 2024. Is anyone else in shock? Anyone else think it’s still actually September because there is no way it’s December 17th? No? Just me? Cool, cool.

It has been a hell of a Fall and beginning of Winter for our household. I think I’m on cold number 4 since September, as are my husband and the kids. For all the amazing moments we get with young kids, the constant illness is definitely a drain on the system.

So, I’m giving myself the gift of the last two weeks of December off from work and writing commitments. Now, that doesn’t mean I can’t schedule some blog posts for the new year if I feel like it but I’m not going to stress myself out trying to post one every Sunday (or beat myself up when some weeks aren’t possible). Merry Christmas to me!

I couldn’t go out without posting my annual Resolution post though. So here it is. May it serve, if nothing else, as a reminder that resolutions are wonderful but not required. If your year turns out to look differently than you planned in a flurry of productivity at the beginning…that’s OK! I think the point is to commit to growing every year, even if we end up growing in ways which are unforeseen.

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Solidarity Sunday: Nostalgia

Posted on by Erin of the Hills

In life you have to learn to count the good days. You have to tuck them in your pocket and carry them around with you.”

Richard Osman, The Thursday Murder Club

I’m not sure if I’ve used this quote in an earlier blog post and apologies if I have (I’m far too lazy to go back and check) but god I love the thought of carrying the good days around with me for when I need them most.

Now, I know I’m incredibly lucky in the beautiful life I have. There are far too many people in this world suffering in truly horrific ways and I am certainly not one of them. That being said, I do have my struggles and some days I feel inexplicably down despite all my numerous blessings. And I’m learning to be OK with these lows because without them the highs would seem infinitely less so.

As part of this process of becoming comfortable with my various emotions, I’ve learned to savour the moments in my life which are undeniably happy. Having been thoroughly enjoyed, I do tend to tuck these moments away and recall then when I’m feeling sad or hopeless. They really do help me to climb out of these dark ruts and back towards the light.

But what about the title of this post, you say. Isn’t nostalgia different than a positive memory? You’re right, brilliant reader. It is. Nostalgia is defined as a wistful or excessively sentimental yearning for return to or of some past period or irrecoverable condition. Usually this means a sanitized and likely inaccurate memory of a time when everything was simpler and worry-free. So not quite the same thing as a genuinely happy experience which you tuck away for future comfort.

But what about when nostalgia and pure joy collide? That, my friend, is the sweet spot. And something I experienced just this past week…read on for a tale of unbridled joy and much-needed music therapy. And a little life lesson, lovingly offered, for good measure.

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Reading Roundup: November 2023

Posted on by Erin of the Hills

I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.

Dame Agatha Christie

This past month has been a tough one, I’m not going to sugarcoat it. We cycled through several colds in our household, the last one being a doozy and I can safely say I was racked with both misery and coughing fits. As a result of that last rough one, I even spent part of an overnight in the hospital with our youngest with the nurses checking her vitals every hour or so. Thankfully she is just fine now and it ended up being most likely a very mild (thank goodness) case of RSV but it was definitely a scary experience – including her very first (hopefully last) ride in an ambulance!

Suffice it to say, reading has not been much of a priority this month as we’ve been in survival mode but I think we’ve gotten through the worst of it (she says hesitantly not wanting to provoke any celestial last laughs). But I did read some great things even if only one of them was a book proper. And for that I am both thankful and proud. See, Mom? Getting a wee bit less hard on myself finally. What an improvement.

So, without further ado and before we all get sick again…here’s my roundup for the month.

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